Sins of the Fathers > Sins > TOC > Timeline

To give you a sense of what happened and when, I've put together this higher-level timeline.


This timeline represents my best efforts to reconstruct what happened to me and when.

1976 Summer

Fr. Timothy Dolan — now Timothy Cardinal Dolan — arrives at Immacolata.

1977 Summer

Fr. LeRoy Valentine arrives at Immacolata.

1977 Fall

The Archdiocese of St. Louis starts offering Face to Face (FtF) confession instead of Dark Scary Room (DSR) confession. I have been going to DSR confession for at least a year. I start going to Fr. Valentine for FtF in the East cry room at Immacolata. Fr. V initiates a tradition of hugging me at the end of our FtF confession sessions. I'm ambivalent. I like the physical contact but it goes on for an awkwardly long time. And increasingly so. My head always ends up in his crotch.

1977 Late Fall

Risk Party at the Rectory in late October or early November. Majority of leaves have fallen from the trees. Just a few still hanging on. There were four of us present at the Risk Party. I think RB, TM, AM, and me.

1977 Winter

First time I pass out in Fr. Valentine's presence. Downstairs by the cafeteria outside the door of the meeting room. He comes up behind me and surprises me. I've never had a problem with fainting before, so much that I've never heard the word "fainting." I think they're saying "faking."

1978 Spring

Fr. Valentine molests a boy during his first confession (FtF). This is probably TS.

1980 Summer

Best guess for That Day. Mom & Dad at Greenbriar right before and over 4th of July.

Problem with Encopresis starts.

1980 Fall

Second time I pass out in Fr. Valentine's presence, this time at the first all-school mass of the year.

Yes it was warm, but they always cranked the A/C. And I never had a problem with passing out during mass before, not even during the marathon Easter Week services.

Fr. LeRoy Valentine

1980 December 26

Trip to the Mud Cave.

Fr. LeRoy Valentine

1981 Summer

Fr. Valentine is moved to MQP. He stays at MQP for only one year. Why?

1993 Summer

Moved back to St. Louis for grad school at Wash U. Immediately start having problems with depression  and go to see psychologist in early 1993. Given the Book "Feeling Good" and learn about CBT.

1997 Easter

First re-enactment of penetration when Laura goes home to St. Louis for Easter and leaves me alone for a week or so.

1997 Summer

Move back to St. Louis from Phoenix.

Second re-enactment (of penetration) while I am in Portland, OR for two weeks.

Moving back to St. Louis, and especially moving in from Innsbrook, flips a switch and suddenly I'm having huge amounts of gender confusion problems. I had none in Phoenix.

2002 March

The story about Fr. Valentine's troubled history breaks in the New York Times on March 3, 2002 and Valentine's resignation is discussed on March 28, 2002. In early/mid March 2002 I have...

  • Multiple conversations with Cardinal Timothy Dolan. He tells me nothing happened.
  • One conversation with an Archdiocese-affiliated psychologist who I assume was Nancy Brown. Her office was at 141 N Meramec in Clayton I think in suite 25 or 23. She told me nothing happened. That I was just "misinterpreting" things.

2002 Spring

Laura meets with and talks with my mom about how I've changed. Shortly after I meet with her at the Bread Co in the U City Loop and ask her to help me pay for therapy. Because I've started struggling. Melting down.

2002 October

Kahneman wins the Nobel Prize in economics, which I had discovered earlier on in the Summer. I mention this because I went from meaningfully researching, and writing, to obsessively researching and no longer being able to write about what I was researching.

2003 February

Bryan is in 2nd grade and makes his first reconciliation. He goes to DSR side and I go to F2F side of confessional on West wall with pastor of St. Elizabeth. I have the first panic attack I've had since 7th grade. It comes from out of the blue. I hadn’t given the Fr. Valentine thing any further thought, because both Cardinal Timothy Dolan and the Archdiocesan Psychologist told me that nothing happened.

2004 October

Law and Order Criminal Intent episode Eosphoros first airs. It is a fictionalization of the story of the murder of Madalyn Murray O'Hair. In the episode, the detectives comment that people often have panic attacks when taken back to a place where something bad happened.

That made me wonder if there was something to my recollections about Fr. Valentine, because of what happened during Bryan’s first confession. The panic attack. But I blew it off because Cardinal Dolan and the archdiocesan psychologist said nothing happened.

2005 February

MK makes her first confession and I have a second panic attack at confession, this time with Fr. Meier in the F2F side of the confessional on the East wall.

2005 April

I start obsessing about baseball and pitching mechanics and first e-mail Dr. Mike Marshall on April 29, 2005 with "Questions About 9/10 Year-Old Pitchers."

I'm becoming physically and psychologically isolated at work.

2005 September

Contacted New York Times writers about Fr. Valentine story from 2002 because the repeated panic attacks during Face To Face confession made me start to wonder whether Fr. Valentine had actually done something to me during confession. I didn’t know what. But I'm not stupid. I knew I had a problem with confession.

On the one hand, I felt like I had dodged a bullet. That I was lucky. On the other hand I was beginning to wonder whether I really had. I couldn’t believe that I could have spent so much time with Fr. V but had nothing happen to me. But I couldn’t remember anything. Well, not that much, but a few things that made me wonder. All of which dealt with confession.

2007 July

I'm laid off by Equifax. As the president of the company said I had become, in his words, "catatonic." I was laid off because my productivity had plummeted. I had become isolated physically and psychologically.

2008 June

First anger/rage/fear episode as I'm driving West on Adams in downtown Kirkwood, right by the YMCA, while Laura and the kids are in Colorado. Right before 4th of July.

2008 December

ACTS retreat (retreatant). Panic attack during F2F confession with Msgr Pieper in North room.

2009 February

Thrown out of the house.

2009 March

Elevator pitch presentation to jewelers. I am unable to prepare because I am unable to think. I can't sleep. I can't concentrate. The first time that ever happened to me. I huess it was a panic attack, but it lasted for days.

2010 January

Divorce finalized.

2010 April

ACTS retreat (on team). Panic attack during F2F confession with Fr. Meyer on South side.

2010 June

Discussion with Pat S. He suggests I might be having problems with anxiety. I think he's crazy.

2011 May 9

I have my meeting with an Archdiocesan Review Team. At the end of that meeting Deacon Phil Hengen and, by extension, the Archidocese of St. Louis (again), implicitly tells me nothing happened by giving me the book Man Enough and never saying anything about Fr. Valentine other than that he denied what I said.

After the meeting ends, I try to find location of office where I met with the woman who I assume was Nancy Brown. I drive past the building multiple times but literally can't see it.

2011 July

I finally get in touch with Deacon Hengen. He tells me Valentine denies everything. Duh. Hengen tells me he wants to my therapist, so I sign all the papers I need to sign. But Hengen never calls him.

2011 November

Jerry Sandusky Penn State scandal comes to light.

2013 Spring

Julie S. notices lesion on arm that turns out to be Cancer (Malignant Melanoma).

2013 April

Updated divorce and parenting plan finalized.

2013 May 10

Articles published in StLPD and RFT about Fr. Valentine's removal.

2013 November

Approach Monsignor Richard Hanneke while working at St. Elizabeth of Hungary. Tell him of the problems I was having getting Deacon Phil Hengen to help me.

2013 November 27 at 10am

Met with Monsignor Richard Hanneke and told him my story and the problems I was having getting help. We had a follow-up conversation a few days later in which he told me all I could do was work through Deacon Phil Hengen at which point I realized this wasn't a bureaucratic screw-up but a strategy.

2014 January

The matrix.

2015 October

Filed lawsuit against Archdiocese of St. Louis.

2016 January

Surgery to remove Cancer (Malignant Melanoma) from right arm. Literally the next day I was contacted by Jeff Passan who wanted to taunt me about his upcoming book The Arm.

2017 September

Settled lawsuit against ArchStL due to problem with Statute Of Limitations (SOL) created by Dolan's Gaslighting me and Hengen's giving me the Run-Around. The pay me $15,000 and I net $9,000.

2018 February 5

Receive Sandra Price e-mail admitting it happened.

Hi Chris,

I wanted to respond to you on behalf of the Archdiocese of Saint Louis.You chose to litigate (LIE) your claims of sexual abuse by Rev. Leroy Valentine.

YOUR CLAIMS WERE ACKNOWLEDGED by Deacon Phil Hengen (LIE), the Archdiocese of Saint Louis (LIE) and the court system. This matter has been fully settled through litigation and is final. Because your claim has been fully settled and is final the Archdiocese of Saint Louis will not be responding to any further inquiries regarding these claims. Please know that YOU AND ALL VICTIMS OF ABUSE are in my prayers and I do hope that you are able to find peace in the future. I wish you the best.

Sandra Price
Archdiocese of St. Louis

2018 March 27

I send the following e-mail to Sandra Price.

Ms. Price,

In the spirit of Holy Week, I'm begging you to please answer one question for me.

For the sake of my mental health and sanity.

Are you admitting it happened?

I think that's what your previous e-mail was implying, but could you please say it out loud?

It would help me tremendously to hear you and the Archdiocese of St. Louis say it clearly and unambiguously.

It happened.


2018 March 29

Two days after sending the e-mail above to Sandra Price of ArchStL I'm visited by two detectives from the Shrewsbury police department. They seem to think I'm planning an assassination.

2018 April 21

Aisha Sultan piece published in St. Louis Post-Dispatch.

2018 May 1

I send the following e-mail to Deacon Bernie Nojadera of the USCCB and cc Sandra Price, Gabe Jones, and Elizabeth Westhoff of ArchStL.

Deacon Bernie,

An(y) update on what's going on in St. Louis?

Things are still terrible for survivors.



I spoke publicly for the first time in this piece.

Gabe Jones commented on it...

“The archdiocese’s record of Mr. O’Leary’s allegations are significantly different; however, due to a court order as well as our own ethical obligation, we are not at liberty to discuss Mr. O’Leary’s case.” Jones also said the information O’Leary shared initially changed multiple times by the time he broke off communication with the Office of Child and Youth Protection."

The interesting thing about Mr. Jones' statement is the phrase "changed multiple times." The only way he could allege that is by admitting that my 2002 conversation with Timothy Cardinal Dolan took place, a conversation that was denied during my 2011 meeting with Deacon Phil Hengen and the Review Team.

But I'm glad ArchStL is now acknowledging my conversations with, and my Gaslighting by, Cardinal Dolan.

Of course, Jones' statement contradicted what Sandra Price told me...

"Hi Chris,

I wanted to respond to you on behalf of the Archdiocese of Saint Louis. You chose to litigate your claims of sexual abuse by Rev. Leroy Valentine. Your claims were acknowledged by Deacon Phil Hengen, the Archdiocese of Saint louis and the court system. This matter has been fully settled through litigation and is final. Because your claim has been fully settled and is final the Archdiocese of Saint Louis will not be responding to any further inquiries regarding these claims. Please know that you and all victims of abuse are in my prayers and I do hope that you are able to find peace in the future. I wish you the best.

Sandra Price"

Yes, her e-mail was full of Gaslighting, but she did say the key words...

"you and all victims of abuse"

So, in sum, things are just as terrible as ever for survivors in St. Louis.

How is a survivor supposed to find peace, much less feel like children are safe and survivors will be cared for, when the Archdiocese of St. Louis refuses to acknowledge the truth.

Of course, I'm writing about all of this in my webbook...

I've cc'd Sandra Price on this both because she is involved and because the last time I e-mailed her, she sicced the police on me and told them I was planning and assassination.

That was unpleasant, but I expect nothing less — or more — from the Archdiocese of St. Louis.

Chris O'Leary

P.S. I have had damning experiences with Cardinal Dolan and was recently contacted by someone who did as well.

Be sure to let him know the truth will out.

And, knowing that this e-mail will be forwarded to the police, I want you and everyone to know that by "the truth will out" I am in no way threatening you, them, or anyone physically.

What I am doing is affirming my conviction to tell the truth and the whole truth.

I'll be watching for the white vehicle of the Shrewsbury police to sit outside my house like it did this weekend.

The next day my mom calls me and tells me the Webtster Groves police want to talk to me. They tell me someone called them and told them they were concerned I was going to hurt myself or someone else.

2018 September

Vigil 1

Fr. LeRoy Valentine

2019 May 25

Vigil 2

Fr. LeRoy Valentine
Fr. LeRoy Valentine